I got truly, deeply, purely happy at 39.
This wasn’t a “blink of an eye” kind of happy. This was a step by step process of learning what it was that made me happy, giving myself permission to pursue it, and then living in the increased states of inner peace and happiness that bloomed as a result.
I found out I loved kirtan and ecstatic dance. After having done seated meditation for years, I found an explosion of God-connection through song and movement.
I moved from LA to the Blue Ridge Mountains, and got to remember how much my soul delights in rivers and waterfalls.
I spent hours on the phone with my conscious girlfriends, dissecting our dating lives to discover where we were stuck in limited thinking, not-enough-ness, or just plain ole’ inauthentic BS. (one of my primo BFF’s above!)
I took workshops on Mary Magdalene, Intimacy, Tantra, & Non-Violent Communication.
I had hard conversations with a bestie. I saw unhealthy patterns that felt terrifying to communicate. I spoke up in the name of learning to do better, learning to be authentic, learning to have healthy communication.
I had a lover. Like, a bonafide lover. One who was there for playfulness and pleasure, and nothing more. It was so liberating!
Through this pursuit of happiness and authenticity, I was actually amplifying LOVE itself, from the inside out. The false ideas of love could not hold in this newer frequency… they had to let go.
Instead I learned….
My relationships began to take on a deeper kind of connection. My friendships had more room for authentic communication. My clients got a deeper, more present version of me.
And I was … well, I was just plain ole’ happy.